Weird dreaming update – Last night was a real winner. I dreamt I was visiting Edmonton. I was to meet up with my closest friends so we could go to Klondike Days, my favorite fairgrounds growing up as a kid. It was supposed to be daytime, but as I approached an old familiar route I used to take to go there (near the 118 avenue pedway) I noticed everything suddenly got so dark. I could not see beyond this pedway and there was nobody there. Total darkness. Even the fairgrounds was very dark. I could see the fairgrounds set up but it looked deserted and there were barely any lights on. It was very dim.
However, even though this familiar roadway was extremely dark and I didn’t know what was waiting for me there I was scared and yet not scared at the same time. I was scared to approach, but did it anyway because I already knew the way. I even didn’t care at that point if there was anybody waiting for me or not because I know the spot so well (even though I hadn’t been there in years) that even if something tried to hurt me it wouldn’t matter. I knew somehow I’d be safe, well sorta.
I travel through and next thing I know the scenery changes and I’m with my closest friends. Oddly, despite they’re close friends I saw no faces so I cannot tell you who they were other than I was close to them.
I do recall next chapter in the dream there was an acknowledgement that since the fairgrounds is no longer accessible and the rest of the city is dead that we’d go to a safe place to at least spend the night and figure out what to do the next day. We go to a house close by that belongs to one of my friend’s aunt and that it’d be okay to stay there. I chose to go along because I trusted these friends. I had no reason not to. When we arrive the house has no sign of life. I just assumed the aunt must be out of town or something. We go into the house and while most of the friends went into the main part of the house, one friend and I go downstairs to the basement. I guess she could see I was tired and needed the rest. When we get to the basement it is nothing spectacular. Just a simple bed and a simple kitchenette. She asked if I was hungry and I said “sure” so she went into the mini fridge and pulled out a head of romaine lettuce and left it on the counter. I approach and I see the lettuce looked fine from a distance, but when I got closer to pluck some leaves off I could see the interior was wilted and discolored. Definitely not a healthy head of lettuce and I say so to my friend. I wasn’t a jerk, but simply stated the obvious. When the friend looked at it she seemed surprised, but not really too concerned about it, pointing out we could probably find something else.
I will admit the dream was rather blotchy, but I do recall asking my friends if they saw what was going on and if they find it weird how things are not as nice as they seem. Each time I’d ask questions or try to point something out they were oblivious. They could not see what I see and did not notice anything out of the ordinary. I gave up trying at that point, thinking maybe it was just me and I was going mad with dillusions.
At that point, with appetite lost, I looked at the mattress on the floor and noticed it was an old, worn out mattress that was stained and smelled funny. That urge to sleep, despite being so tired, subsided as now all I wanted to go was go home. As much as I didn’t want to, I had to leave my friends behind. I leave the house and go my own way. As soon as I left I saw that house cave in and crumble. I wanted to go back, despite knowing my efforts would be futile, to see if there was any of my friends in there I could save. However, there was now an alarming urgency to move forward and don’t look back. I do just that. I go through the dark, abandoned streets of Edmonton (my old city) as I find my way home. Now, I’ve lived in different parts of the city and what was odd at this point was I wasn’t sure which home I was going to. All I knew was I was headed southwest from that 118 avenue. I was finding what started out to be a walk through deserted streets in the night soon saw me begin to take flight. Not high, but as I was leaving the ground the city all around me was being systematically destroyed. I could see it and the view had gone from street level to aerial.
The dream ended there, but it was really weird. That one will leave a mark. I do believe what stemmed that dream was the fact I’ve spent so much time and energy trying to wake people up and get them to realize the world around is definitely not at all what it seems and we need to take action. It pains me the most when those I’m closest to either fail to see it or are dulled with denial. I have actually tried to pull away and just shut up, but I can’t do it. There’s something inside me that won’t let me and I actually feel guilty when I do try to walk away. As hard as it will be for many to understand, but I do care a great deal about people (and animals and our environment) and I never want to see anybody hurt. Even those I’m in opposition with and those I speak out against I have no real animosity towards either. I’ve always understood each person is entitled to their own opinions and their own beliefs. Those who are really strong to stick by them earn my respect even if I don’t agree with their views. Those who are stuck in between, not sure what direction to go, I feel for because I’ve been there. I’m still there in a way, but I am taking action. I don’t even care if I’m taking the right action to be honest, but I know I can no longer just sit like a bystander and pretend there’s nothing wrong when I know clearly there is. As for those who are in on this fight with me, even if we don’t always see eye to eye I give kudos to and hope the paths they’re travelling on are justifiably rewarding ones. This is what I wish for everyone, regardless of who they are.